We See You: Navigating Family Planning in Uncertain Times
As a mental health clinician who works closely with individuals and couples navigating family planning, infertility, and reproductive challenges, I want to speak directly to those of you feeling shaken, fearful, or frozen by the state of our country right now. You're not imagining it. The climate is heavy.
With the current administration’s push to dismantle long standing protections and agencies, including threats to reproductive healthcare access, it is no surprise that so many of my clients are questioning everything:
“Is it safe to bring a child into this world?”
“What happens to my treatment if I lose my job — or my insurance?”
“What if I don’t finish this process in time?”
These are not just abstract worries. They are real, pressing barriers rooted in policy and inequity.
The Barriers You're Facing (and Why They Matter)
Unemployment and Loss of Insurance
In the midst of pursuing IVF, IUI, or egg preservation, many are hit with sudden job loss, a reality intensified by the erosion of federal worker protections. When employment vanishes, so does insurance coverage. And fertility treatments, which are already prohibitively expensive, become even more inaccessible.
Legal and Policy Uncertainty
Across the country, we’re seeing changing laws around bodily autonomy, parental rights, and access to care. This creates fear, especially for LGBTQ+ families, single parents by choice, and those using donor sperm or eggs. The legal framework that once felt predictable now feels fragile.
Emotional Toll of Prolonged Uncertainty
Trying to grow your family while the world around you feels unstable adds an invisible layer of grief. Grief for what was planned. Grief for what may not be possible. And grief for the future you once imagined.
How to Cope When the Ground Feels Unsteady
If you are reading this and feeling overwhelmed, I want you to know: your fear is valid. Your grief is real. And you are not alone.
Here are a few ways to protect your emotional well-being:
Acknowledge the Loss of Control
It’s okay to admit this is hard. There is strength in acknowledging that parts of this are out of your hands. It doesn’t mean you’re giving up, it means you are human.
Anchor into Your Why
When the external world is chaotic, return to your internal truth. Why do you want to build a family? What values do you hope to pass on? Keep those reasons close as a guiding light.
Reassess Timelines — Not Dreams
You may need to shift your plans, but that doesn't mean your dream is gone. Flexibility in how or when you build your family is a form of resilience, not defeat.
Seek Support Without Apology
Whether through a therapist, support group, reproductive justice networks, or close friends — allow yourself to be held. You shouldn’t have to navigate this alone.
Stay Informed but Guard Your Peace
Stay up to date on policy changes but limit doom scrolling. Create information boundaries. Choose trusted sources. Your nervous system deserves protection.
To Those in the Middle of Family Planning: We See You
We see your courage. We see the silent calculations you're making every day.
We see the jobs you’re staying in just for insurance.
The appointments you’re juggling.
The medication you’re injecting with trembling hands.
The hope you're holding onto, even when it feels naïve. You are not broken. You are not behind.
You are navigating a storm with grace that no one sees. If no one has told you lately: You're allowed to feel scared and still want this.
You are seen. You are supported. And no political shift can erase your right to hope.
